If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?
Chasing Cars - Snow Patrol


Date six. I show up at his house after having dinner with a prof who was trying to entice me to apply to be his research assistant with booze and his gorgeous eyes. Well, probably not so much the eyes, but def. the booze. The eyes might have worked a little better. I can’t relocate for a research assistantship –silly. But it’s awesome to hang out with Professors who think you’re brilliant and it cleared up some prior suspicions.

It’s even more awesome to show up at a boys house drunk, plop yourself on his couch and find his arms around you and his lips meeting yours.

Very nice. I love his kisses. They are almost perfect. The only thing that would make them better is the removal of the goatee. I don’t even know how to describe their perfection. Soft but not sloppy. Warm. Tender. Perfect tongue, exploring mine.

Oh. He hates glitter, which is disappointing since I just bought flavoured glittery body powder. Mmm bubblegum.

He told me my hair smelled really good.

When I told him I had a really good time at dinner cause it was nice to hang out with people who think you're wonderful, he said what about people who think you're great? I asked if great was better than wonderful? And he said, cause I think you're great, cause I don't want to be like everyone else.

sigh. In another situtation. I would have said that great is not as good as wonderful. But I don't care. He thinks I'm great. And shortly after saying that he put his tongue back in my mouth, which felt almost as good as the words.


The more I get to know him, the more scared I get. Can something have too much potential? Can someone be too perfect? This blog makes me sound like I’m worried all the time. It’s not true. I’m happier than I’ve been in a long time. I feel full. Everything feels alright. And not just cause of Eric.. but you know.. the happiness in that one area of my life.. is helping the others... i have a friend that I like in P__ now. I'm not nearly as bored, and I don't spend every weekend with my parents - or fucking randoms.

Chris from PEI called tonight. It was a little weird. He seems sad that it’s pretty much over, he does a lot of verbal pouting. I don’t really understand, cause in my opinion he’s the one that fucked it up. If he had called me when he said he was going to. If he had showed up when he said he was going to. I would have been willing to at least try. But. Shit dude. I’m not a doormat.

Oh. And I’ve been getting daily emails from Mandar who is in India right now visiting his family. I told him to bring me back an elephant.